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Handling Unwanted Infertility Advice

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Updated December 29, 2010

It can seem that unwanted infertility advice is the norm for couples undergoing infertility treatment. When well-meaning family members and friends get wind that you’re having difficulty getting pregnant, they can sometimes be quick to offer tons of unwanted infertility advice. What’s the best way to deal?

Don’t talk about it. This may be obvious, but not talking about the struggles you are going through will keep a majority of people from bringing it up themselves. Of course, there will be people in your life with whom you’ll want to share things with, but chances are, they won’t be the ones showering you with unwanted advice.

Smile and nod. Put a smile on your face, acknowledge and thank them for the advice and then take what you want from the conversation. Sometimes, the advice will be valuable and usable; other times it won’t. Take what works for you and leave what doesn’t.

Change the subject. When your great aunt starts offering sex or fertility advice, changing the subject to something slightly more benign can make the point that you don’t want to talk about it.

If all else fails, a simple “Thanks for the advice, but my doctor says (insert excuse here)” can work wonders. Even though most people are genuinely trying to help, unwanted infertility advice can still be a pain to deal with. Having a game plan ahead of time, though, can make handling unwanted infertility advice a bit easier.

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